Friend or Best Friend

A deeper love makes the difference

The love of friends is an essential part of a full life. With friends we can laugh, let our hair down, and be ourselves in ways that perhaps we can’t with our families. As much as friends enrich our lives, there’s something different about a best friend, that one person who just gets us in ways and at a level that no one else seems to understand. Their support is stronger and love deeper in a bond that seems more spiritual than casual. It’s hard to pinpoint what exactly constitutes a best friend, but if you’re lucky enough to have one, you know it. Here’s what some people said makes the love of a best friend so unique.

They’re honest with you.
Friends are quick to compliment you but aren’t always honest with critical feedback because they don’t want to upset you. They won’t tell you that the dress you’re trying on doesn’t flatter your figure or that you’re choosing the wrong kind of person to date…again. A best friend always tells the truth even when it isn’t what we want to hear because our health and happiness are more important to them, and they know our bond is strong enough to survive any temporary upset from what they have to share.

They call often.
How many times have you heard someone say they lost touch with friends over the years who just seemed to fade away? In those situations, the bond wasn’t strong enough to produce a desire to stay in touch. Best friends call each other every day or at least several times a week without having to think about it. It’s the love they have for each other that drives the desire to want to stay connected, to want to know what’s going on in each other’s lives. Absence doesn’t make the heart grow fonder in any kind of relationship, and regular contact is essential for two people to grow together.

They take your side.
Friends will empathize if you’ve been done wrong by someone, but a best friend sees himself as your protector. Maybe your boss dumped one of his own projects on you so he could leave for vacation early. A friend might say how awful that was and put on a sad expression. A best friend would say, “That’s ridiculous. He’s taking advantage of you. You deserve more respect than that.” This is especially the case if they hear anyone talking bad about you. A best friend is loyal to the end and will defend your honor. Friends almost never take the risk by jumping into the line of fire.

They give advice.
Friends will listen, but they don’t always know you well enough to tell you what to do in certain situations. When things start to go sideways, a best friend will sit you down and offer advice or tough love because they know you as well as they know themselves, sometimes more so.

They give total support.
So you want to start your own business. Friends will be cautiously optimistic while telling you all the reasons why it might not work out. A best friend makes sure you’re aware of the risks, but then gets behind you 100% and tells you to go for it, reminding you of all your talent and experience that will work toward its success. A best friend is your greatest cheerleader who rejoices at your successes as much as their own, and they never get jealous.

They get your weird humor.
Best friends often have a load of in-jokes that come from spending years of great times together. Sometimes there can be so many it can seem like your own unique language. The humor of these things is usually lost on more casual friends.

They show up.
Whether you’re stranded at the airport, broke down on the side of the road at 2am, need a ride to the emergency room or people to help you pack and move, a best friend is there. Barring a natural disaster or personal emergency, a best friend is reliable and shows up when you need help. Theirs is the number to call, and they’re glad to do it. Friends are often too “busy”. This is especially the case in times of illness or loss.

They keep your confidence.
A best friend knows how to keep your secrets. Wild horses couldn’t drag it out of him. They know the meaning of strictly confidential and see protecting your private information as equally important as protecting you. Casual friends tend to have looser lips.

They don’t keep tabs.
Best friends do special things for each other as an expression of the love they share. There is no such thing as, “I paid for lunch for lunch today, so you have to pick up the tab next time.” Best friends don’t count favors or hold expectations about what they feel they’re owed from one another. Generosity flows effortlessly between them.

They love sharing mutual memories.
Casual friends don’t want to hear the same funny stories and memories told over and over again. The best friend you share them with, however, never tires of reliving them and having a new laugh over good times past.